The Cheeseburglar

Last week at McDonald’s Playland, I offered Rose her very first cheeseburger. At first the concept was lost on her. She wanted nothing to do with it when she was in her high chair, but after she had been playing for a while, she came back over and finally took a big bite out of the cheeseburger.

And the world would never be the same. Apparently she thought it tasted pretty good because after that I could not pry the cheeseburger from her hands without her screaming bloody murder. I can’t say I blame her. Cheeseburgers are pretty yummy. I’d be pretty pissed off if someone tried to take my cheeseburger from me.

She also screamed when I tried to put her back in the high chair or keep her in the tiled eating area of Playland. She just wanted to hold the cheeseburger like it was a toy and occasionally take bites out of it. She took the cheeseburger hostage and toddled off to conquer the Playland.

I found myself in a situation I couldn’t fix. On the one hand, I didn’t want her to get cheeseburger all over the Playland equipment; on the other, I didn’t see this as a battle worth fighting. So, she got to keep her hostage. The cheeseburger stayed in her tight little clasp while she climbed all over the equipment. Meanwhile, I kept my fingers crossed that I wouldn’t get scolded by another parent or McDonald’s employee. Most of the parents seemed to think the situation was pretty funny, but you know someone out there thought I was letting her get away with murder.

In the end, I managed to rescue the cheeseburger before it got ketchup on any of the equipment.

It’s great to have another cheeseburger enthusiast in the family, but next time I hope she expresses her love by eating the burger instead of taking it hostage.

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