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Kid Menu WTF

My kids and I are always really happy when the waitress hands them crayons and coloring pages, but when it’s time to figure out what we want to eat, things head south quickly.

For some reason, every restaurant ever prints the children’s menu right on the coloring page.
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In a way, this COULD make sense. Maybe bigger kids look at their own menus to figure out what they want to eat, and if they are coloring it ANYWAY, it might as well be the only thing the waiter hands to them. The trouble is the menu on the coloring page spells disaster with smaller kids. They can’t read the menu, which means the parents need that coloring page to help them order.

For reasons I can’t figure out, most restaurants lately haven’t been printing the kids’ meals on the main menu. I guess they figure if you have the coloring page at the table, you don’t need the same information printed in the adult menu. Wrong. If my kids are coloring, they don’t want me to look at the coloring page you just gave them to figure out what they should eat. While Lily is old enough to read the menu, she’s not old enough to figure out if there are any dairy-free choices on it and I need to look. Rose is NOT old enough to read the menu at all. I need to see that sucker if I’m going to figure out their meals and how much they are going to cost.

But when I go to look at the menu on the coloring page, somebody gets upset. Somebody shrieks “Hey! That’s MY coloring! I want to color!” Somebody pouts until I’ve finished making a selection.

The coloring page that was meant to bring peace to our table has now caused more discord than would have happened had no coloring page been brought to our table at all.

Why do restaurants insist on putting the kids’ menus on these things? And IF they must insist on putting them there, why not also put the menu on the adult menu so the parents can figure out the food/bill?

The kid menu on the coloring page is just one of those things that restaurants have all wrong, and I bet none of them even know they are causing problems. And trust me they are. Every time I go out to eat, I have this problem even after explaining to the kids WHY I must take their coloring away for a minute. I’ve seen other mothers struggle with the same thing. STOP THE MADNESS!

People for kid menus being reprinted in the regular menu! Riot!

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Friday Funnies: A Night at Bob Evans

Last time we were at Bob Evans, Rose ran her own comedy show. First she cried about a couple of things, though it’s been a couple weeks since this happened and I can’t remember what. It was probably not wanting to take her coat off and not liking her chair. After we finished eating, Rose got territorial about the toddler at a table near us. There was an empty table in between us and Rose got VERY upset when the other toddler started playing with the chairs.

Rose hates other toddlers. I’ve written before how she yells “NO! This is MY Mommy!” to them the second she sees them. How dare this other toddler be in the same restaurant as us? How dare she touch the table near ours? Clearly all the empty tables belonged to Rose!

Shortly after this showdown, Lily and I went to the bathroom. While we were gone, Rose went rogue and started running around the restaurant looking for us. Her major stop was at a table of truckers.

For some reason, I wasn’t at the table of truckers.

Dr. Toy Warden: “I don’t think they’re her.”

My husband herded Rose toward the bathroom and soon I could hear Rose outside.

“Where is my Mommy? I lost my Mommy!”

She kept knocking on the bathroom door.

This happened at my last OB appointment too. The girls waited with their dad in the waiting room after they watched my ultrasound and while I was seeing the real doctor. I could hear Rose freaking out about my whereabouts the entire time and it was all “I lost my Mommy! Where is my Mommy! Mommy? Mommy?” and knocking on the door that separates the waiting room and the hallway where the exam rooms were. That whole thing escalated into a tantrum to a level that Dr. Toy Warden had to take the girls out of the doctor’s office altogether!

Anyway, both the restaurant patrons and the people at the doctor’s office were telling Rose they hoped she found her Mommy soon. I’m not sure why Daddy isn’t good enough, but clearly he wouldn’t do. I don’t remember Lily causing this much comedy and drama over my whereabouts at this age! It’s a hassle, but it sure is funny after the fact!

When I emerged from the bathroom, Rose cried “I found you, Mommy! I missed you!” and gave me a big hug.

Clearly I can never go to the bathroom or the doctor without two to three little girls with me again. It was crazy for me to even try leaving one of the girls behind! What was I thinking?

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